Poetry in Motion Pictures: Die Hard

Have you ever watched one of your favourite movies and thought, ‘You know what, I’d love to see that turned into a short poem’? Er, no, didn’t think so. Well tough, that’s exactly what you’re going to get here.

DIE HARD

By Hans Gruber

….

Touching cowboy, touching.

Or should I call you Mr McClane?

Your antics are annoying.

I wish you’d stayed on your plane.

*

What idiot put you in charge?

You make me want to cry.

You asked for miracles, Theo,

I give you the FBI.

*

Where are my detonators?

This is becoming quite a bore.

I’m going to count to three,

There will not be a four.

*

Hans_Gruber_1

Troublesome for a security guard,

You think you’re John Wayne? Rambo?

Give me the code as now I have

A machine gun. Ho, ho, ho.

*

Mr Takagi will not be joining us…

For the rest of his life.

Soon I’ll get to someone you do care about,

Like your long-suffering wife.

*

Asian Dawn? I read about them in

Time Magazine. Yippie-ki-yay.

And my name? Not important now

But it’s Clay… Bill Clay.

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