Top Five… Christmas villains

oogieboogieChristmas is a time for forgiving, a time for forgetting. Not for these guys though – this is the meanest bunch of Bah Humbugs around.

5. Frank Cross – Scrooged


Forget the happy ending where Frank (Bill Murray) gets all touchy feely – he’s at his best when he’s being mean. From the writing on his office wallpaper (‘Cross: (n) A thing they nail people to’) to his solution for fixing antlers to a mouse (‘Did you try staples?), he really is one of the bad guys.

4. Stripe – Gremlins


Shifty card player, strong swimmer and nasty little bugger, even when he says ‘Yum yum’ he’s frightening. As a Mogwai, he was not very nice, bullying Gizmo because he was simply cuter than him. As a fully-fledged Gremlin, he’s a nightmare, bringing a whole town to its knees. An agent of absolute chaos. A major inspiration for Heath Ledger’s Joker.

3. Oogie Boogie – The Nightmare Before Christmas


The rap sheet for Oogie Boogie is pretty indefensible. Just below ‘compulsive gambler’ and ‘Santa kidnapper’ you have ‘made of insects’. He looks scary and he is scary. Great singer though.

Click HERE to listen to Oogie Boogie in action.

2. Henry F Potter – It’s A Wonderful Life


This guy makes Oogie Boogie and Stripe look like Elmo and Kermit. Mr Potter is one nasty piece of work. This is what Ebenezer Scrooge would have been like if he had just enjoyed a decent night’s sleep on Christmas Eve. The only love he feels is for the dollar and he regards handing out loans to the poor as ‘sentimental hogwash’. Mind you, there are a few banks that could have done with him at the helm during the credit crunch.

1. Hans Gruber – Die Hard


Who else could have filled the number one spot but our very own trailer-trasher? Hans Gruber does everything a good Christmas bad guy should: he spreads a little bit of cheer amid all the terror. Lover of sharp suits, reader of Time magazine and exceptional thief, Hans is the seasonal villain who just keeps handing out the presents. Never afraid to do his own dirty work, Gruber is an evil terrrorist who leads by example. Now we have our king of Christmas badassery… ho, ho, ho.



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4 Responses to “Top Five… Christmas villains”

  1. Man, I’d have to go with Potter. What a piece of s**t. You ever see that SNL skit where the whole town gangs up on Potter and kicks his ass? Awesome. Good list though, guys.

    Also, been getting a lot of heat about Die Hard being the best Xmas movie over on Cut The Crap. What is this world coming to?

  2. Hans is hands-down the best holiday villain. But I think there are a couple others.

    I guess the Grinch is really just a less effective version of Frank Cross. I still like the Abominable Snowman from Rudolph…he scares me.

    You shouldn’t overlook the Martians that Santa Clause eventually conquers; they have tickle rays and giant robots.

    But maybe my favorite is a young John Lithgow who, teaming with an elf played by Dudley Moore, has the temerity to take on Santa Claus himself.

  3. How about Randolph & Mortimer Duke from Trading Places!

    Hans is defiantly the winner here, Also a mention for his medieval counterpart, the Sheriff of Nottingham. He threatened to cancel Christmas, and it wasn’t even a Christmas movie!

  4. Coffeecrimson Says:

    Hans gets my vote. There’s something about killing someone on Christmas – and enjoying it- that just says it all.

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