Top Eight… Movie Beards

This week sees former Hollywood heartthrob Ben Affleck get his facial hair groove on by getting all bearded up for his new movie, Argo. With this in mind, what are some of the best beards to grace the big screen?

8.

Beard: Felix Leiter

Beard in: Casino Royale (2006)

Beard by: Jeffrey Wright

Beardometer: Beardy eye

Beard verdict: Like its owner’s poker playing, this beard isn’t the flashiest. But there’s just something about it that says, ‘I am cool.’ Licence To Not Shave

7.

Beard: Richie Tenenbaum

Beard in: The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)

Beard by: Luke Wilson

Beardometer: Strength of the bear-d

Beard verdict: A real chin scratcher. The tennis-playing, thinking man’s beard. Movie isn’t the same after he shaves it off. Neither is he

6.

Beard: Obi-Wan Kenobi

Beard in: Star Wars

Beard by: Alec Guinness

Beardometer: Nothing to be beard but beard itself

Beard verdict: Ewan McGregor’s looked like it was stuck on in the prequels, but beard of Guinness goes down smoothly. Strike it down and it will become more beardy than you can possibly imagine

5. 

Beard: General Zod

Beard in: Superman II (1980)

Beard by: Terence Stamp

Beardometer: If there’s a world left when all this is over, I’d like to buy you a beard

Beard verdict: Not even getting trapped in a stupid spinning parallelogram can stop this beard. Evil but brilliant

4.

Beard: Jack Prescott

Beard in: King Kong (1976)

Beard by: Jeff Bridges

Beardometer: It was beard that killed the beast

Beard verdict: Bridges’ beard in The Big Lebowski might get more plaudits, while his Iron Man beard might be more sinister, but this underrated exercise in facial fantasy should not be overlooked. Mainly cos it makes him look hairier than King bleedin’ Kong

3.

Beard: Harry Ellis

Beard in: Die Hard (1988)

Beard by: Hart Bochner

Beardometer: Hans, booby… beardy

Beard verdict: Not easy to out-beard Hans Gruber, but Harry Ellis just about pulls it off. Thankfully, he doesn’t pull his beard off. Because it’s magnificent

2.

Beard: RJ MacReady

Beard in: The Thing (1982)

Beard by: Kurt Russell

Beardometer: Beard on a wire

Beard verdict: Tops ZZ Top. As Snake Plissken, Russell threw the razor away for a day or two. Here he throws it away for the winter, and the result is a bushy mess we just want to roll around in

1.

Beard: Prince Vultan

Beard in: Flash Gordon (1980)

Beard by: Brian ‘King of the Beards’ Blessed

Beardometer: Brigitte Beard-ot

Beard verdict: The beard by which all movie facial hair must be judged. Imposing, beautiful, striking.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE MOVIE BEARD?

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One Response to “Top Eight… Movie Beards”

  1. Johnny Shields Says:

    Great piece on beards today, but poor ol Ellis from Die Hard didn’t get a picture. His beard, topped with his cheesy grin, demand one. And perhaps an honourable mention for Serpico?

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