Top Five… movie injuries
Being a hero is a dangerous business. Someone might cut off your nose to spite your face, or you might saw off your own hand because it’s possessed. It’s tough out there.
5. Unhappy feet – Die Hard
It’s Christmas Eve at the Nakatomi building and all is quiet, except for the sound of… rapid bursts of gunfire! Terrorists can be so goddam mean. Especially if you have forgotten to put your shoes on. It will take more than a few blisters to stop John McClane though. Yippee-Ki-Yay, Kimosabe!
4. Pain in the neck – Death Becomes Her
More Bruce Willis, but this time he gets to watch Meryl Streep and Goldie Hawn go to war on each other. Falling down stairs, shotgun blast to the belly… never mind, they’re just flesh wounds. And yes, Meryl is ridiculously hot.
3. Robot wars – Short Circuit 2
It was the axe swing that was heard around the world. Where were you when they beat the crap out of Johnny 5? And why wasn’t Steve Guttenberg there to stop it? Don’t worry kids, he gets up after this.
2. Give him a big hand – Evil Dead II
Bruce Campbell’s finest two minutes. It may be dumb, gross and laugh-out-loud funny all at the same time, but this scene also contains a brilliant piece of acting by the Big Chin. You actually do believe he is cutting off his own hand. Groovy.
1. Hard nosed – Chinatown
The cinematic injury to end all cinematic injuries. It’s not a huge one, yet you can’t think of Roman Polanksi’s classic without picturing Jack Nicholson all bandaged up. The fact that it’s Polanski who actually sticks the knife in Jack’s schnoz just makes this all the more fascinating to watch.
WHAT ARE YOUR FAVOURITE MOVIE INJURIES?